The water hitting me from the shower felt heavy as it trickled slowly down my body this morning. It is around 4 am. The shower ran under cold water yet I don't feel cold. It felt rather cathartic. It left me feeling light. Or perhaps my growing skepticism and disgust about the world I live in has left me immune to physically feel the cold. I haven't slept. I haven't traveled anywhere beyond my own apartment the entire day. But I needed to take a shower. I needed to feel clean.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
revolt
Friday, October 10, 2008
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Saturday, August 09, 2008
there's no such thing as a free meal
If ever you happen to be walking in a tall large corporate building, what comes across your mind seeing people in sharp suites rushing with big steps, looking straight overhead and leaving nothing but a distinct scent of branded perfume... the smell of success perhaps?
My immediate thought is, I would never want to be anything like them.
As I changed into a fake officer outfit for a school movie project today, I came to this very thought of how much I would resent myself if everyday I would have to come to work in a uniform alike. Then I remembered a conversation made by this guy at school about the reason why people work so hard to climb to the top of the corporate ladder. And once you're there, what happens next?
It made me think. I personally don't understand about people that are power crazy. Which is why whenever I get the chance to meet someone of authority in any field, without trying to pry, I actually ask what motivated these people to want to get there. I'm endlessly curious about what took place as the defining point in that persons life to want to persevere to the top of the world? Personal vendetta? A better life? Challenge?
There was a time I used to look at the creative field and business field as two completely opposing worlds. Like I was looking into a large aquarium glass with people in suites talking a language I don't care to understand. Little did I know I was going to be apart of both worlds. An obvious example of this irony was when one day I went to a particular bank - which happened to be regarded as a big international corporation - my 'radar' could still detect two graphic designers smoking below that gigantic building. Apparently they were working there. I still have a bit of animosity towards the objective of commercial art and that are creating it more and more into a business. But I know like they would know that unless you are unbelievably brilliant and willing to strive be idealistic at all costs- you are going to live on the street. Proving that our society and as human beings cannot function without benefiting from each other. After all, as much as a corporation benefits oneself, it does impact greatly in sustaining economic growth at large. It's like a food chain.
Which is why I believe it is impossible to completely turn your back and resent people who decide to be a part of the so called system- if you simply look at it them trying gain power and money. This system wouldn't exist without reason. And they chose that path. And as communities we do need certain leaders, we do need people who are willing to take risking that privilege to a better direction. Because if they're not the ones doing it, who will?
My immediate thought is, I would never want to be anything like them.
As I changed into a fake officer outfit for a school movie project today, I came to this very thought of how much I would resent myself if everyday I would have to come to work in a uniform alike. Then I remembered a conversation made by this guy at school about the reason why people work so hard to climb to the top of the corporate ladder. And once you're there, what happens next?
It made me think. I personally don't understand about people that are power crazy. Which is why whenever I get the chance to meet someone of authority in any field, without trying to pry, I actually ask what motivated these people to want to get there. I'm endlessly curious about what took place as the defining point in that persons life to want to persevere to the top of the world? Personal vendetta? A better life? Challenge?
There was a time I used to look at the creative field and business field as two completely opposing worlds. Like I was looking into a large aquarium glass with people in suites talking a language I don't care to understand. Little did I know I was going to be apart of both worlds. An obvious example of this irony was when one day I went to a particular bank - which happened to be regarded as a big international corporation - my 'radar' could still detect two graphic designers smoking below that gigantic building. Apparently they were working there. I still have a bit of animosity towards the objective of commercial art and that are creating it more and more into a business. But I know like they would know that unless you are unbelievably brilliant and willing to strive be idealistic at all costs- you are going to live on the street. Proving that our society and as human beings cannot function without benefiting from each other. After all, as much as a corporation benefits oneself, it does impact greatly in sustaining economic growth at large. It's like a food chain.
Which is why I believe it is impossible to completely turn your back and resent people who decide to be a part of the so called system- if you simply look at it them trying gain power and money. This system wouldn't exist without reason. And they chose that path. And as communities we do need certain leaders, we do need people who are willing to take risking that privilege to a better direction. Because if they're not the ones doing it, who will?
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
all i need is a pair of mom jeans
Menu yang bisa gue bikin sekarang:
* Semur Daging with kentang
* Sate panggang ( haha.. ga punya grill )
* Sup Sayur
* Bayam & jagung kuah bening
* Gado-gado..
* Fillet ikan
* Tumis Daging with paprika & soy sauce
* Perkedel kentang
* Perkedel Jagung
* acar
* Tumis buncis & jamur
* fettucini with cream
* nasi goreng
memang kurang presentatif baik dalam bentuk dan ..rasa haha
tapi bolehlah mak, bangga sama anakmu ini...
Saturday, July 26, 2008
mj's moonwalker game
Whatever the reason is for making a game of a fallen superstar still shows the magnitude of his existence.. in spite all the creepy allegations that is.. hee hee. Founded here
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Monday, July 21, 2008
denial isn't just a river in egypt
my best friends are getting married!?
is it just me? Or did someone tilt the structure of the solar system??
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
"For years most people didn't know I wasn't yellow. Du Ke Fung means `like the wind'. It's an extremely poetic name, as opposed to this piece of shit sitting before you. So this person called Du Ke Fung with no past or parents or ID card makes the films and at night he turns back into this drunkard called Chris Doyle."
I found out he worked a lot with filmmaker Wongkarwai. I'm a little too behind.
His work:
www.chrisdoylestudio.com
I found out he worked a lot with filmmaker Wongkarwai. I'm a little too behind.
His work:
www.chrisdoylestudio.com
Friday, July 04, 2008
Saturday, June 28, 2008
God knows I've always been such a klutz. Yesterday afternoon I took money from the atm near 7/11, and rushingly, I took my money and forgot to pull out the atm card. Ofcourse, I didn't realize that. I took the bus, went to school to do some editing till late, after wards went to central till around 9 or 10 pm. Still not realizing anything wrong. Then there was a bazaar in front of the place, and it was just as i was thinking about buying new wallet did I realize my atm card was missing. I canceled buying, and called the bank to shut my account. When noone picked up I frantically started scanning the crowded ground like a total idiot..even though I already lost hope, and assumed somebody would have stole it by now I decided to go back to the atm booth where i first retrieved money that afternoon, anyway.
To my disbelief my atm card was STILL THERE!!!
To my disbelief my atm card was STILL THERE!!!
Sunday, June 22, 2008
adaptation
John Laroche: You know why I like plants?
Susan Orlean: Nuh uh.
John Laroche: Because they're so mutable. Adaptation is a profound process. Means you figure out how to thrive in the world.
Susan Orlean: [pause]
Yeah but it's easier for plants. I mean they have no memory. They just move on to whatever's next. With a person though, adapting is almost shameful. It's like running away.
Susan Orlean: Nuh uh.
John Laroche: Because they're so mutable. Adaptation is a profound process. Means you figure out how to thrive in the world.
Susan Orlean: [pause]
Yeah but it's easier for plants. I mean they have no memory. They just move on to whatever's next. With a person though, adapting is almost shameful. It's like running away.
Sunday, June 15, 2008
B and I
B! says:
u start a relationship and then u fall in love
B! says:
not the other way around
rosanna says:
man why is it so complicated.. i never thought like this when i was little lol i used to believe theres one person for everyone and thats it
rosanna says:
but it turns out to be as hard as those coin games you know where you can never actually pick up the toy in side
rosanna says:
what is that thing called
rosanna says:
with the mechanical arm
B! says:
haha
B! says:
yeah i know wat u mean
B! says:
and its sucks when ur mechanical arm pics somthing u lik..but then u run out of time before u can get it into the exit slot
B! says:
haha
rosanna says:
exactly
rosanna says:
u end up wasting coins
rosanna says:
its a lie
B! says:
and sometimes u see two u like..and one u like more and end up with the one u got out....and then its like dammit
B! says:
haha
u start a relationship and then u fall in love
B! says:
not the other way around
rosanna says:
man why is it so complicated.. i never thought like this when i was little lol i used to believe theres one person for everyone and thats it
rosanna says:
but it turns out to be as hard as those coin games you know where you can never actually pick up the toy in side
rosanna says:
what is that thing called
rosanna says:
with the mechanical arm
B! says:
haha
B! says:
yeah i know wat u mean
B! says:
and its sucks when ur mechanical arm pics somthing u lik..but then u run out of time before u can get it into the exit slot
B! says:
haha
rosanna says:
exactly
rosanna says:
u end up wasting coins
rosanna says:
its a lie
B! says:
and sometimes u see two u like..and one u like more and end up with the one u got out....and then its like dammit
B! says:
haha
Friday, April 25, 2008
elephant girl?
Taking a break from apartment hunting on the internet, I looked for The Elephant Man on youtube last night, and stayed up till morning watching clips of the movie. Afterwards I just sat, perfectly still in front of my computer for a good 10 minutes with a million questions running through my head. I can't help thinking how tragic this story is.
It reminded me alot of this film called Mask, (not The Mask tough) this movie back in the 80s starring Cher, about this single mother trying to protect and raise her psychically deformed son as a normal kid. This boy, born with a disease that caused him to have an abnormally large head and a very misshaped face structure which looked like he was wearing a mask for trick or treating, or something, hence the title of the movie. But as the movie reveals itself you'd understand the title doesn't solely suggest the kid's physicality but it's also about the mother, and what she's struggling hard to hide from the world and her own son.
I had a discussion with my best friend, if we happen to meet someone like the elephant man, or say someone with a disease or you know they are dying, would you make a conscious effort to be nice to them? as opposed to meeting a person on a regular basis?
I know the first thing I would feel is sympathy. And even though I try to be nice to everyone I meet, I would inevitably be extra nice to that person - out of feeling fear, or feeling sorry- and I don't know if that's a good thing.
I asked her if gender would have anything to do with it. Like most movies I loved about the neglected, I always noticed these lone wolves happen to be male. It made me wonder if they were female, would the story be any different? And is it easier to sympathize for men with that situation then it is with a woman with that condition? If so, why? why is our society condemned with this sad view? and am I supposed to be angry at people's personal choices and tendencies?
I'm not trying to unearth an ugly betty situation here, and I don't know if its a bit post-feminist, but I am very curious and it's very fascinating to me. I think it's a subject matter I want to keep digging in and create into..
It reminded me alot of this film called Mask, (not The Mask tough) this movie back in the 80s starring Cher, about this single mother trying to protect and raise her psychically deformed son as a normal kid. This boy, born with a disease that caused him to have an abnormally large head and a very misshaped face structure which looked like he was wearing a mask for trick or treating, or something, hence the title of the movie. But as the movie reveals itself you'd understand the title doesn't solely suggest the kid's physicality but it's also about the mother, and what she's struggling hard to hide from the world and her own son.
I had a discussion with my best friend, if we happen to meet someone like the elephant man, or say someone with a disease or you know they are dying, would you make a conscious effort to be nice to them? as opposed to meeting a person on a regular basis?
I know the first thing I would feel is sympathy. And even though I try to be nice to everyone I meet, I would inevitably be extra nice to that person - out of feeling fear, or feeling sorry- and I don't know if that's a good thing.
I asked her if gender would have anything to do with it. Like most movies I loved about the neglected, I always noticed these lone wolves happen to be male. It made me wonder if they were female, would the story be any different? And is it easier to sympathize for men with that situation then it is with a woman with that condition? If so, why? why is our society condemned with this sad view? and am I supposed to be angry at people's personal choices and tendencies?
I'm not trying to unearth an ugly betty situation here, and I don't know if its a bit post-feminist, but I am very curious and it's very fascinating to me. I think it's a subject matter I want to keep digging in and create into..
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