A friend working in the embassy was asked to look for an Indonesian girl, specifically one with a career woman look. Why they had to look for someone from the embassy to be cast is beyond me. Clearly I shrugged it off. I went home and Haris told me to go for it while giving me the number of that person. I took it but I didn't do anything about it until late in the afternoon. It was a home staff who explained to me it was an ad for an insurance product called Prudential Insurance. He also explained casting was going to last till 11 pm, so I sure did take my time. Not out of confidence, I had nothing to expect. But then I thought, hey why not? I thought worse comes to worse I'll still meet producers, see the process..besides they asked the embassy so maybe looks wasn't such a big deal. Or so I thought...
A friend whom promised would come then blew me off last minute. (Great huh! complicated teenage affairs). Dinda could've easily be cast I thought, but she was in Hua hin. And there I left to take a taxi all by myself. Now the problem was the area was somewhere I wasn't familiar with. I was only equipt with a map OF the place, and turns out the taxi driver was illiterate (the weirdness doesn't end there). So I called the casting agent that guided the driver. I walked in to the studio ushered by the casting lady and Lord did my jaw drop. The place was filled with MODELS!! Silky haired-smooth-clean-tall-slim-long legged-don't hate me cuz i'm beautiful- THAI MODELS!!! And not just one or two, MANY!!! I stood there with their eyes looking at me and I literally felt my self esteem drop into the size of a watermelon seed arriving inside my throat and with that I swallowed. Hard. WHAT THE HELL WAS I DOING THERE!!! Suddenly the casting lady shoved me an applicant form.
"From what agency?"
"Huh?! agency? No, no...Hmm.. Mr. Toto from the Indonesian Embassy? He told me to come here for the casting. I'm Indonesian."
"ooooh ok. Sure fill in please."
They gave me a script to memorize, in Indonesian. It was bad. The wardrobe lady kindly asked me over to her side to measure me. I got even more nervous. She told me to sit down, amongst those living mannequins. I smiled to everyone, they smiled back. I didn't care to start a conversation with anyone. I just sat there frozen. I was so scared. I was extremely nervous. The only person who I could reach was Anisha who laughed uncontrollably. But she told to go for it. Then the makeup person called me to do my face (I was excepting for him to look at me sideways, raising his eyebrows). His make up was beautiful. How minimalistic it was compared to Indonesian make up artists, esp bridal. Then the hair stylist did my hair. I looked in the mirror and I looked pretty good. Whoever said "Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder" must be good at persuasion. And gay. No straight man out there I tell you..
I waited, til I was the only one left. I was dressed as a corporate lady and wore high heels. I was actually starting to feel confident. The clothes shaped me. Man, I really do have curves. Seriously, I wouldn't trade myself for a stick figure any day. Ok, maybe I could use being just a little taller. And.. the superficiality was getting to my head. Waiting there fidgeting, the memories of my awkward adolescence was starting to crawl back like Sadako from a tv screen. Slowly reaching the fragile pinnacles of whatever s left of my self-esteem. Oh god.. don't open that door..I memorized my lines too. All my ridiculous acting experience in SAE didn't help at this point. The last model walked out. Geez, she looked like those type of women men would propose on one knee in an aquarium at Sea World, just because. She told me I can enter and wished me good luck. Charming lady, I thought. Inside I watched this Thai guy acting his last bit. He was very nervous. When it came my turn I had to carry a board with my height, weight, name written on it and say it aloud to the camera. I made mistakes. They took side pics and front. I felt like a criminal suspect. Then they told me to sit on a leather chair - the acting part begins. I had to recite the given material taped below the camera which wasn't Indonesian, but English. They told me to act it out while translating. Naturally, many more mistakes.
"MORE POWER! MORE POWER!" The casting lady yelled.
For the love of God.. I'm no actor honey..What I had to do was sit on a leather chair sideways, and at the call of ACTION I was to move my head to the camera and I was meant to start acting the lines in a dangerously powerful manner to the camera. The likes of an Italian Mafia boss, or those antagonists in movies that sit on a leather chair holding an angora, only I didn't have a cat and I was promoting insurance. I really tried to do my best! When we were finished, the director told me I lacked emotion from my eyes...hmmm I wondered how that is? Because the last bit I was told to talk as I normally as I could. I sometimes wonder if that's how people see me? Distant?
Lesson learned : acting skills? NONE!
But now I'm really curious about the tape. I finished at 12 am...!! It was a scary ride home taking the taxi. I really really wished someone was with me through all of this craziness.
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